Overcoming Perfectionism

Today we’re diving into a topic that impacts athletes at all levels and one that I have quite a bit of personal experience with not only in sports but in life: perfectionism.

Changing perfectionist beliefs about your game does not happen overnight, but the good news is, you can start today. We’re going to discuss key strategies to help you manage perfectionism and improve trust in your skills. 

Transcript

Speaker: 0:01

I'm Dr. Nassim Ebrahimi, and welcome to Becoming My Stronger Me, a podcast designed to help you become stronger in mind, body, and heart. In season two, the mental performance series, we'll explore the intricate relationship between mental performance, sports excellence, leadership, and personal growth to help you become your stronger you. Today we're diving into a topic that impacts athletes at all levels, and one that I have quite a bit of personal experience with, not only in sports, but in life. Perfectionism. Changing perfectionist beliefs about your game doesn't happen overnight. But the good news is you can start today. We're going to discuss key strategies to help you manage perfectionism and improve trust in your skills. So let's talk about perfectionism. It's a bit of a double-edged sword. On one hand, it pushes you to excel, to really push your limits. But on the other hand, it can lead to overthinking, anxiety, and this crippling fear of making mistakes. But what exactly is perfectionism? According to the American Psychological Association, perfectionism is the need to be or appear to be perfect, or even to believe that it's possible to achieve perfection. Sounds exhausting, right? Honestly, it can be. Research shows that perfectionism is linked to various negative outcomes in athletes, including burnout, lower self-esteem, and impaired performance. A study published in the Journal of Sport and Exercise Psychology found that athletes with high levels of perfectionism were more likely to experience performance anxiety and less likely to enjoy their sport. And let's be real, sports should be fun. So how do we combat this? Let's dive into our first strategy. Move out of the practice mindset. Our first strategy is to move out of the practice mindset when it's game time. This means trusting the skills you've developed during practice instead of constantly trying to perfect them during competition. Think about it like this: practice is where you're honing your craft, learning new techniques, and working on your weaknesses. But game time, that's where you let it all flow. Take volleyball, for example. During practice, you might be hyper-focused on seeing the ball and targeting your passes. You're analyzing your footwork, your hand placement, everything. But when you're in a game, you need to let go of that analytical mindset. Just get to the ball and make the pass. Play athletically, not perfectly. And this isn't just for volleyball. You could take a look at basketball. Players spend hours, days, weeks practicing their free throws, for example, their shooting form. But during a game, they have to trust that muscle memory. They can't afford to overanalyze every shot. Or in golf, golfers can really get technical with their swing mechanics during practice, but during a tournament, they have to rely on their instincts, trust the swing that they've practiced, and not let their mind get in the way. A study by the University of Queensland found that athletes who trust their training and focus on overall flow of the game perform better under pressure than those who micromanage their every move. So next time you're in a game, remember to trust yourself. Your practice has your back. Our second strategy is to give yourself permission to make errors. This one is huge. Mistakes are inevitable, even for the pros. The key is to be more accepting of these mistakes and learn from them. Let's take Serena Williams, for example. She made her fair share of errors on the court, but she's the master at moving past them quickly. She doesn't dwell on mistakes, she focuses on the next point. This mindset is crucial for maintaining performance under pressure. You have to embrace mistakes as part of the learning process. Dr. Brene Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston, who does a lot of research on leadership, emphasizes the importance of embracing vulnerability and the courage to be imperfect. This mindset shift can significantly reduce the fear of making mistakes. Consider soccer. Even the best players like Messi or Ronaldo miss shots and make errors, but they don't let those mistakes define their game. They move on, they keep playing, and they trust their skills. It's also important to remember that perfectionism isn't just about not making mistakes, but also how we respond to them. Acknowledge your mistakes, learn from them, and then let them go. Holding on to them will only weigh you down. Our third strategy is to perform in the flow or effortless state. Have you ever been so immersed in an activity that you lose track of time? That's what we're talking about here. Flow is a psychological concept defined as the state of complete immersion in an activity. When you're in flow, everything feels effortless and you're not self-conscious about your performance. Trying to be perfect can disrupt your flow. Instead, react intuitively and let your training take over. When you're in flow, you're focused on the present moment, which enhances your performance and enjoyment. Again, let's take soccer. Players like Messi, he often talks about playing in a state of flow where he's not consciously thinking about every move, but rather letting his instincts guide him. This flow state allows him to make split-second decisions and execute them flawlessly. In basketball, players like Steph Curry, when he's on fire, it's almost like he's in a trance. He's not overthinking his shots. He's just letting them fly based on years of practice and muscle memory. A study in the Journal of Applied Sports Psychology found that athletes who frequently experience flow states are more likely to perform at their best and feel a greater sense of fulfillment from their sport. So next time you're in a game, try to find that flow state. It really is where the magic happens. The next strategy: let's keep it simple during games. Perfectionists tend to overcoach themselves, leading to overthinking and second guessing. Instead, aim to perform efficiently by relying on what you've trained in practice. Michael Phelps, the Olympic swimmer, often emphasizes the importance of simplicity. During races, he focuses on key aspects like his stroke and breathing rhythm rather than overthinking his technique. Marathoners are very similar. They don't think about every single step they take. They focus on maintaining a steady pace and staying relaxed. Overthinking can lead to tightening up and losing efficiency. By keeping your approach simple, you reduce the cognitive load and allow your instincts to take over. The last strategy here is to trust in your skills. And this one's a big one because it ties everything together. You've put in the hours, you've done the work, and now it's time to trust the work. Whether you're a golfer, a basketball player, a swimmer, soccer player, or any other type of athlete, these principles apply across the board. Trusting your skills means letting go of the need to be perfect and focusing on the present moment. So there you have it. Managing perfectionism in sports is all about moving out of the practice mindset, giving yourself permission to make errors, performing in the flow state, and keeping it simple and trusting your skills. It takes time and effort, but the rewards are well worth it. I hope these strategies help you manage your perfectionism and boost your mental performance. Remember, perfection isn't the goal, progress is. Until next time, don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, join our Facebook group, send in your stories and feedback, and if you're looking for a mental performance coach or want more information, go to www.becoming my strongerme.com. I can't wait to hear from you.